A Walk Through Life

Several years back, I've had mixed feelings about Christmas. It was like a part of me wants to rejoice and celebrate in this season of giving but there was also a part of me that grieves and aches for the loss of my mom. Yes, it was five years ago, a few days before Christmas, when we lost mom. It took me some time before I have overcome this huge feeling of loss. At the time of her death, it has only been less than two months since I got married.  I remembered I was juggling my time between work and married life that all I did was wish I could go home and see her. Who knew we would lose her that year? Definitely we were all clueless. If I had known, I thought I would have put off everything else and spend most of my time with her that year. But everything is all in the past now. I know she's happy where she is already. Every time I think of her, I would recall the happy times with her. I would also recall those times when she was starting to worry that I didn't have a lo...

Even though we had already agreed that the sendoff party was also our celebration of mom's birthday, we (hubby, yours truly, Dipdip, and the nanny) went to Compostela to celebrate with grandmother. We're the only ones who are available on that day since my brother already returned to Abu Dhabi while everyone else (including dad) has already returned home for the next day's work. And so, we just brought with us a cake, lola cooked two or three dishes, and my aunt prepared macaroni salad. Well, I can't show a lot of pictures because my camera was showing symptoms of A.D.D. again  :-) But look at how amused my Tita S (mom's sister) was with my daughter who seemed to be energetic at that time to show everybody her talent in dancing. Yes, lately, our one-year old princess dances everytime she hears music from the television commercials. Sometimes, she would sing, too (believe me). We didn't really celebrate that much because my Tita S has been diagnosed with th...

[The paragraphs you will read below are from my mommy Diana's journal. Even though she has already joined our Creator, I still feel very much connected to her in many ways, especially because I kept her journals with me. I've always loved her funny and natural way of telling her experiences even though I know that sometimes there are emotional or sad stories behind them, just like this one.. Read on if you are curious. :-)] I was inside a room in a hospital, I wasn't supposed to enter... of course, I can read numbers, have virtually memorized the room I was always visiting and sometimes doing some attendance ... the patient was a dear person in my heart. Naturally, to go back in that room was instinct. I forgot that my patient has insinuated the other day that he will transfer to a very expensive suite 'coz staying there for almost a month was flagellation if he won't transfer. The attending nurse had announced earlier there was now a vacancy on that long coveted...

Here's another entry from mom's journal of happy moments . I don't know why she found this one funny. Well, back then, she always finds the humor in everything; even in difficult times. Read on below if you want to know the details. Back To The Original  My eldest daughter, a high school graduating student wanted a new pair of shoes. Our remaining budget could not afford to buy her one, except when she has to wait for the next payday. She has caused me confusion when she, on tantrums, demanded immediate replacement when she kicked the worn-out shoe in front of the T.V. set where we were viewing at the time of her need. I really noticed when she kicked them off the floor that there are holes in the soles.

When it comes to my mom, I will never run out of stories to tell even when she is now already with the Lord. We got along very well except for those tiny things like using her pens and losing them eventually that it would really send her irate. I know mom wouldn't mind if I share what she had written on her journal because she was supposed to have this one published. DIARY'S DIARY by Mommy Diana I was folding my eldest daughter's clothings when I noticed a two-year old diary. I have 2 feelings when I saw it: One, is to read it out of curiosity ; the other is to ignore it as something trivial or inane. Then a thought came as suddenly as I was about to set it aside, that of knowing how I rated with her as a mother, either she loves me or hates me. As a full-time wife and mother, I thought I could read something flattering that could encourage me to do better than before if not my best. As I was scanning the pages which are of value to me, I finally ran my fingers...

I remember a time during my high school days when I kept losing my pen that I have to borrow my mom's. Actually, 'borrow' is not the term for it because I had to use it without her permission. What's worse about it is that I usually end up losing her precious pen. I can't remember how many times I have been scolded for running off with her pen and losing it at school and then eventually she would have to buy a new one for herself--the cycle never ended until I graduated high school. Writing had always been her passion and the pen was her only tool to write down her thoughts. In fact, we both agreed that a writer should never run out of pen and paper wherever he or she goes. So, when I finally got a job, I had the chance to buy personalized pens for her and the rest of the family. More than everyone else, she was so happy with the gift. If my mom's still alive today and now that it is no longer that expensive to own a computer and hook up with the Internet, she w...