Friday, June 20, 2008

desperate but hopeful

i've been waiting for you
i've been expecting you
i guess you just want us
to keep anticipating
i will be happiest to hold you in my arms
sing you beautiful songs
and tell you stories
when will you come?
or will you ever come?

it's not even a year after my marriage but i've already experienced this "baby fever", the sheer wanting to have a baby. sometimes it's quite a disappointment to have several missed periods and negative pregnancy test results. why am i not like some women? i wonder why there are so many unwanted pregnancies out there when there's one hopeful woman out here wanting to conceive? will God deny me the chance to become a mother? we don't know yet. all i know is that i don't have all the time to wait. each year that this dream is not realized, it lessens my chance of becoming one. i'm not getting any younger, ya know. God, please let me be...

boy, did i sound desperate?... must be the rain... Comments, anyone?

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Don Moen's REVIVAL Concert

Last april 11th, we had the chance to listen to Don Moen's songs live at the U.S.P. Open Grounds in Lahug, Cebu City. It was really a good experience. I can't fully describe how I felt that night but I've been crying for almost the whole run of the concert. Tears of happiness would be a good guess. I felt so happy that I'm sharing this experience with my husband, that we both agreed to buy tickets to the show. Well, I really would have wanted to watch in the front row but I have compromised to buy the general admission tickets since this is more or less out of our budget. Anyways, front row or not, we still felt God's presence that night. I felt so happy and blessed that me and my husband are one in rejoicing and praising God.

just a few musings here and there....

i wrote this one months ago, sorry for the late post... :)

TO PEACE AND FREEDOM

what do i really want to write today? well, you see, work has always been keeping us busy. getting up early. deadlines. work extensions. production output. fear of getting feedbacks from client. definitely trying to keep things in order. whoahh, things could never get as stressful as this. and what do you know, that's not all. there are lots of things that have gotten into my nerves these days. i call these petty annoyances. they're petty but somehow they still get into my nerves. good thing though they don't stay up too long. i always try to get it out of my system right away. there are far more important things to think about, anyway.

when i'm feeling something other than being happy, my husband notices it. i am very transparent. and i couldn't help it. i can't show a smile when something is bothering me. i'm not the frowning type, though. most of the time i put on a happy face. this is why it's easy to know when i'm distracted about something or somebody. that only proves i'm not a hypocrite :) hmm, i can get a little defensive, too.

if there is one song i would need to sing to myself everytime a person gets into my nerves because i find his or her actions or words offensive, it would be a line from the song "Ebony and Ivory" ... "We all know that people are the same wherever we go. There is good and bad in everyone..." this way i am being reminded that i should learn to accept the other person's weaknesses. there is good and bad in everyone. yes, and definitely, i am no exception. as to the extent of the goodness and the bad, well, it doesn't really matter. what matters is that we recognize that we need to change for the better. it's nice to live in perfect harmony. no enemies. no grudges. no stress. no hatred. no guilt. just peace. and freedom.

ah yes.. there is good and bad in everyone... but let's not make this one as an excuse.. we all need to change for the better. and if it takes a frown to get you or me a message, then I guess it needs to show.
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